


On Your Guard

by keepyourpantsongohan



Series: Kakayama Week 2018 [6]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Anbu Yamato | Tenzou, Co-workers, Established Relationship, Hokage Hatake Kakashi, Humour, KakaYama Week 2018, M/M, Romance, Rumours
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-12
Updated: 2018-05-12
Packaged: 2019-05-03 04:36:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14561022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keepyourpantsongohan/pseuds/keepyourpantsongohan
Summary: Tenzō pokes him in the chest. He doubts Kakashi feels it through the layers of his robe. “People think we’re having sex.”Kakashi blinks. “We are having sex.”“That’s not thepoint.”(Kakayama Week 2018 Day 7: ANBU Bloopers)





	On Your Guard

“So Tenzō,” says Kō abruptly, “what’s the Hokage like in bed?”

Tenzō splutters. “Wha—we’re not having this conversation,” he says, his face turning an impressive shade of red. 

Kō hums. “That bad, huh?”

He takes a deep breath in order to calm himself, but only partially succeeds in drawing away the flush. “I won’t be baited,” declares Tenzō. He nods towards the door of the locker room. “Take your speculation somewhere else.”

Kō groans. “Come on, Tenzō, you’ve gotta give me something. There are a lot of bets that need to be settled.” At Tenzō’s silence, he sighs, and asks, “Will you at least tell me if he’s well-endowed?”

Tenzō puts his head in his hands. “Why is this happening?”

“I don’t know what you were expecting,” says Kō. Tenzō can’t see his face, but he strongly suspects there’s a grin on it. “If you were trying to be discreet, you and Kakashi-taichō shouldn’t be having sleepovers at ANBU HQ. People were bound to notice.”

“We were just  _sleeping_ ,” says Tenzō, his voice muffled by his palms. 

Kō pats him on the shoulder. “Sure you were. And I’m sure it was an accident when Yūgao saw him put his hand on your behind during your last guard duty.” 

“You’re fired,” says Tenzō, lifting his head. He glares at the hand on his shoulder miserably. “Demoted. Benched. On bathroom duty. Whatever will get you to stop talking.”

“I don’t think you have the power to do all that,” muses Kō. He’s definitely smiling now, a hand on his chin in mock-thought. “Although, if your  _boyfriend_  were to approve it...”  

Tenzō stands. “I’m leaving. I’m going somewhere I can’t hear this nonsense anymore.”

As Tenzō walks through the door, he hears Kō call out behind him, “Tell Hokage-sama I said ‘hi!’” 

* * *

 “This is all your fault,” says Tenzō darkly. Instead of the remorseful look he should receive in return, all he gets are amused eyes and a light chuckle. He splays his hands on the desk, bearing down upon the offender. “It’s all absolutely unnecessary.”

“Tenzō,” says Kakashi in a placating tone, “There’s really no need to get so worked up about it.”

Tenzō stares down at him, unamused. “Do you have people asking about the  _girth_  of your ANBU guard?”

At this, Kakashi’s eyebrows raise, but he doesn’t seem particularly concerned. He shrugs. “Well, no, but ANBU  _is_  technically supposed to be anonymous. It’d be hard for them to know who to ask about.” Eyes twinkling, he adds, “I hope you were complimentary.”

“ _Kakashi_.”

“Yes, Tenzō?”

Tenzō pokes him in the chest. He doubts Kakashi feels it through the layers of his robe. “People think we’re having sex.” 

Kakashi blinks. “We are having sex.” 

“That’s not the  _point._ ”

The Hokage leans back in his chair. “So you’re mad because people believe something which is... true?” he asks, bemused. With a tilt of his head, he asks, “Because it’s your private life, or because it’s me?”

Tenzō lets out a deep sigh, straightening up. “Because you’re the  _Hokage_. That means something, to the ANBU.”

Kakashi stands, and rounds his desk, moving beside Tenzō to touch his side. “It was going to happen eventually,” he says consolingly. “The ANBU tend to have a close-up view of the Hokage’s personal life. They’ll get used to it.”

“I don’t know if I want them to,” admits Tenzō, still frowning. His own hand joins Kakashi’s at his side. “I’m a division captain. I want them to respect me. I don’t know if they can if they think I got here because of favouritism.”

“You were the most-distinguished of the ANBU  _before_  I was Hokage,” Kakashi reminds him. 

Tenzō warms faintly under the praise, but he mutters, “The new recruits don’t know that.”

“They will,” assures Kakashi, his hand drifting up to Tenzō’s face. “Once they see you in action, no one will doubt your competence.”

Against his will, Tenzō finds himself comforted. Whether by tone of voice, or finding a combination of words to assuage the brewing worry in his gut, Kakashi is putting him back at ease. He’s always been particularly good at that, he notes, caught between impressed and annoyed. 

He voices the latter. “Smooth-talker,” says Tenzō, raising an eyebrow.

“Smooth, but sincere,” says Kakashi, shifting closer. 

And because all of Tenzō’s self-control flew right out the window the moment he started seeing Hatake Kakashi, he makes no move to draw away when Kakashi leans in towards him. He lets Kakashi kiss him, ignoring the fact they are in the Hokage’s office, that he’s in his ANBU uniform, that even with Kakashi’s back to the window, there would be no question of what they were doing for anyone looking through it.

Tenzō finds some solace in the fact that Kakashi is technically on a lunch break. He’d timed this meeting as such, to maintain the illusion of separation between their professional and private lives. And he knows Kakashi, for all his platitudes, cares about their positions as well, so there’s no harm in indulging what amounts to a commonplace affectionate gesture. 

He feels Kakashi smile against his mouth when his hands tug the Hokage closer.

They both feel the presence of another person at the same time. When Tenzō pulls away from Kakashi, he can see an ANBU with a light-brown hair and a mask like a leopard cat lurking outside the office window. Code-named Soku, if Tenzō recalls correctly. Fourteen years old, talented but impertinent. 

Kakashi turns around, sighing, once the fabric of his mask is affixed over his cheeks. He slides the window open. “Come in, Hinoko.”

She hops in without preamble. “Call me Soku, Hokage-sama! Did I, like, interrupt?” she asks, eyeing Tenzō. 

“The Hokage and I were just finishing up,” says Tenzō, making sure to school his expression into something detached.

It doesn’t work. Soku giggles. “Didn’t look like that to me,” she says. Tenzō’s sure if her face was visible, he’d be seeing a smirk. 

Tenzō prays that she’s not type of fourteen-year-old to gossip with her friends. He and Kakashi hadn’t been, when they were in ANBU, but they’d been out of the academy before most kids had begun. 

Kakashi clears his throat. “Was there something you needed?” 

“Right! I have the report from, like, that mission in Kusa with Rō, Hokage-sama,” she says, handing him a stack of papers. “Since he’s, like, on a new mission, I wanted to make sure you got it.”

Kakashi glances at the papers and sets them on his desk. “Thank you, Hinoko,” he says. 

“Soku! It’s way cooler than that lame name,” she insists. She turns her gaze on Tenzō again. “You’re, like, that buntaichō with the mokuton, right? So are you, like, the Hokage’s boyfriend?”

Tenzō gives Kakashi a look which he hopes screams, ‘I told you so.’ “Should you be asking about the Hokage’s personal relationships?” he asks curtly. 

Soku looks back at Kakashi. “Your boyfriend’s kinda rude, Hokage-sama,” she tells him. 

Kakashi, wisely, does not comment on this statement, and instead thanks her again for her timeliness. But when she disappears from the window, Kakashi dissolves into laughter, pressing his head against Tenzō’s shoulder.

“This is all your fault,” Tenzō says again, wondering if it would be treasonous to tie him up with mokuton and leave him here.

* * *

“So, I hear you were found naked with the Hokage in his office,” remarks Yūgao casually, as they sharpen their swords. 

Tenzō chokes. It is only by the grace of years of experience that his hand doesn’t slip. “You shouldn’t say that kind of thing while I’ve got a sword in my hands, Yūgao. I could’ve lost a finger.”

She acknowledges the criticism with a nod. “Well, were you?”

He glares. “Obviously not,” he huffs irritably. “Where did you hear a thing like that?”

“Here and there,” Yūgao replies, hands steady on her blade and file. “From Monkey, for one. And half the members of Team Shi were talking about it on the training grounds. If it helps, they think you’re too reticent for it. They said it had to have been in the Secret Archives building, if anywhere.”

Tenzō looks at her out of the corner of his eye. “And that’s better?”

Yūgao shrugs. “They honour your commitment to secrecy?” 

He sets aside his file and starts working at his katana with a whetstone. “This is really getting out of hand. Rumours among our team is one thing, but I’d rather not be spoken of by the rest of the ANBU,” he says, careful not to damage his sword in his moodiness. “No one ever speculated on the Godaime’s life like this.”

“Tsunade-sama’s personal affairs weren’t quite this interesting,” Yūgao says, but her tone is sympathetic. “You could try to confirm or deny things between you and Kakashi-senpai. Then you’d have some control, at least.”

“It’s none of their business,” says Tenzō belligerently. “There isn’t any rule against it. I’ve checked.”

He realizes the implication of his words as soon as he says them, and he turns his head quickly to search for a change of expression. On Yūgao’s part, she is smiling, though she hasn’t looked up from her sword. “It  _is_  your business,” she agrees. “But the ANBU believe the Hokage is  _their_  business.”

Tenzō returns to his task, sighing. “Perhaps,” he says reluctantly. A little more quietly, he adds, “Thank you. For not asking questions.”

“I do have one question,” she says, and Tenzō nods his acquiescence. Amusement in her voice, she asks, “What’s he look like under that mask?”

Tenzō holds up his katana menacingly, but Yūgao only snickers.  

* * *

 “Yamato-senpai, can we borrow you for a second?” asks an innocent voice.

Komachi and Towa come at him in a pair, just like the way they attack an opponent. They’re not on Team Ro, but Tenzō and his squad were paired up with them enough for missions under the Godaime that he’s quite familiar with them.

He thinks Komachi’s use of his village code-name is an attempt to set him at ease, since he knows she's heard Yūgao and Kō use his name from Kakashi’s tenure as captain. He’s immediately wary.

“How may I help you?” asks Tenzō cautiously. 

Towa grins. “I’m glad you asked!”

Komachi nods eagerly. “You see, we’re on rotation for border duty next week. But, the way things look, we won’t be back in time for the festival that’s going on. Of course, we’ll follow our orders, but we couldn’t help but wonder...”

“Could you have us reassigned?” asks Towa, clasping his hands. “We’ll take double the shifts next week. There’ll be a light show from Kumo shinobi that Komachi would like to see, and I want to meet a chakra tattoo specialist from Iwa.”

Tenzō folds his arms, eyebrows drawn together. “I’m not your squad leader.”

“Well, no...” agrees Komachi, “But we’d heard...”

“You’d heard what?” prompts Tenzō, sure he won’t like the answer.

Towa pretends to find the locker behind Tenzō very interesting. “We’d heard you and the Hokage were... close.”

It takes all of Tenzō’s will not to throw his head against the lockers. “No,” he says, shaking his head. 

Komachi frowns. “No, you won’t get us reassigned, or no, you’re not close?”

“No,” repeats Tenzō, more firmly. “We’re not doing this. You’re  _ANBU_. If you have a request for the Hokage, you can go and make it to him yourself. It is neither appropriate nor within my jurisdiction to oversee your missions.”

“But—” says Towa. 

Tenzō keeps shaking his head as he exits the room. “Good luck with your request,” he says, without bothering to look back at them. 

As the door shuts behind him, he hears Komachi say, “You know, you’d think a guy who was knocking boots on the Hokage monument would be a little less reserved about his personal life.” 

* * *

 “Between our two squads, we should have enough personnel for the trip to see the Daimyō. Kakashi-sama has left it up to us which members we send.” 

The other captain, Zō, has been part of ANBU as long as Tenzō. It makes sense that the two of them would be given this responsibility, even if the meeting they’re facilitating is about civic concerns rather than combat. “Here are the members I think suited to the task from my squad,” Zō says, sliding over a sheet to his fellow captain.

Tenzō considers the choices. It’s a well-balanced squad. “I think these should work. From my squad, three ANBU should be more than sufficient. I can count myself among that number,” he muses, writing his name down.

Zō, to his surprise, flushes. “That is... inadvisable.”

Tenzō looks at the other man askance. “Why is that?”

“Forgive me for saying so,” says Zō tentatively, “But your... intimate affection for the Rokudaime may make you ill-equipped to judge whether a threat is severe or not.”

Tenzō tries not to break his pencil. A crack appears nonetheless, but the wood is smoothed over by the subtle movement of his thumb. “My feelings for the Hokage hold no bearing on my ability as a shinobi,” he says patiently. “You may look at my personnel file if you have doubts.”

Zō doesn’t seem affected by the reproval. “And the Hokage’s feelings for you?”

He’s been in ANBU long enough to know when someone’s trying to extract information. He’d almost be amused by the effort if it wasn’t so off-putting. “The Hokage is capable of making decisions objectively,” he replies carefully. 

“Is there reason to test his objectivity?” 

Tenzō feels like their conversation is veering further and further away from the mission. “Kakashi-sama has taken many missions with former subordinates. There shouldn’t be a problem.” He hands over the list he’s been working on. “Here are the other members of my squad I think would pair best with yours. If you agree, we can send our roster to the Hokage’s office.”

The black-haired man looks it over. “These pairings appear adequate.”

Gladly, Tenzō rises. “If that’s all... then I’ll be on my way.”

“Well, there is one more thing,” says Zō.

Tenzō waits, halting the hand that is set to move the chair. “Yes?”

“I’d heard whispers about you and Kakashi-sama on the roof of the Fire Daimyō’s residence. If they’re true, perhaps he wouldn’t appreciate if you two were present together—”

Though it’s a vicious waste of chakra, Tenzō leaves a wood substitution in his place.

* * *

 In the end, they are, literally and metaphorically, caught with their pants around their ankles. Tenzō has made a point not to interact with Kakashi in public any more than strictly necessarily, which means that when Kakashi visits him in his home, he has an excess of pent-up energy that might’ve otherwise been quelled by subtle touches and teasing words. He can’t be blamed for being a little eager.

There’s probably something terribly undignified about jumping the Hokage.

“Easy, now,” says Kakashi, trying to keep his balance. 

Tenzō doesn’t bother replying, and drags him towards his bed. Kakashi laughs at his haste, but complies with the attempts to undress him. Their clothes fall off either side of the bed as their hands and mouths find each other’s bodies. 

Feeling a little impatient, Tenzō tries to tug off his pants without removing the wrappings. It doesn’t work, and he ends up falling forward onto Kakashi, who’s having the same problem. 

It is then that a man in a sparrow mask appears at his window, open to let in the night breeze. 

“Hokage-sama,” says the ANBU, embarrassment colouring his voice. 

“Tokuma,” says Kakashi, sounding for all the world as if he’s been caught drinking tea instead of in bed with someone who is, technically, his subordinate. “Why are you here?” 

From his eyes, Tenzō can tell he is a Hyūga. Never before has Tenzō been less enthused that Konoha carries a kekkei genkai with nearly 360-degree vision. He scrambles to cover them up, but it likely doesn’t do much good with the byakugan active. 

Tokuma turns his head, mumbling, “The barrier around the Secret Archives building was breached.”

Kakashi and Tenzō both tense, glancing at each other. Kakashi has his clothes on and is on his feet in an instant, asking, “Was anything taken?”

“No, Hokage-sama,” Tokuma says, looking back at his leader. He makes a point not to look at Tenzō who is dressing as they speak. “Investigation into the breach led to the discovery that it was a rabbit that managed to get through.”

Tenzō’s eyebrows fly up. “A rabbit?”

The ANBU nods. “The animal was harmless, and seems to have no jutsu cast upon it, but we realized that the current wards are only effective for  _humans_  trying to infiltrate.”

Kakashi puts a hand to his chin thoughtfully. “So... if someone with a jutsu like the Yamanaka possessed an animal, they could go back and forth without being noticed.”

“Exactly,” says Tokuma. “We need to change the jutsu formula immediately, but that requires the permission of the Hokage. I was sent to get you. You weren’t in the Hokage’s residence, so I looked for your chakra and found you here.” The white eyes dart toward Tenzō quickly. Tenzō imagines there’s a blush under the porcelain mask.

“You have my permission,” says Kakashi. He turns to Tenzō. “Could I have something to write a note?”

Tenzō grabs a pen and pad from his desk and hands them to Kakashi. He begins scrawling out instructions. When he’s done, he crosses over to the window. “Alert these barrier specialists and follow the steps I’ve outlined. It’ll take a few hours, so I can look over their work in the morning.”

Tokuma bows his head and accepts the paper. “Yes, Hokage-sama. Sorry to interrupt.”

When he’s gone, Kakashi sits back down on the bed, looking at Tenzō. “Well, I suppose we’ve confirmed the rumours now. It’s a little hard to pass this off as just talking.” 

“I’m not half-naked for most of my conversations,” Tenzō agrees, resigned to his fate. 

Kakashi chuckles. “You’d be a terrible ANBU, if you were.”

“I don’t know,” says Tenzō, throwing himself back down on tangled sheets. “It could be an effective strategy for distracting the enemy.”

“I’d certainly be off my guard,” Kakashi tells him. He makes it sound like it’s a compliment. 

Tenzō takes it as one. He reaches for Kakashi, pulling him backward until they’re lying beside each other. “I guess being public about this isn’t all bad. Of all the Hokage, you’re the second-most handsome,” he replies.

Kakashi splutters, and Tenzō cheerfully ignores it, opting to pull the blankets over their heads. They’ll deal with the rumours in the morning. 

**Author's Note:**

> A follow up of sorts to [Excessively Good Spirits.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13431672) Dating the Hokage as an ANBU operative is tough.


End file.
